HE DOESN’T KNOW HOW MUCH I LOVE HIM

Greying ginger homosexualist graphic designer Patric(k) King on seven kinds of clients (via his Twitter [start]; copy-edited).

  1. Client A will only discuss things that are problems to her. If she says nothing at all, I’ve knocked it out of the park.

  2. Client B won’t discuss things she dislikes because she feels rude. I must watch for what she won’t comment upon, or she’ll get agitated.

  3. Client C doesn’t know what he thinks and gets embarrassed by that. So I reassure him that he looks great while he focuses on content.

  4. Client D refuses to communicate at all, so if he E-mails a request, he needs it right now.

  5. Client E seems really high maintenance but in actuality just needs to talk visual problems out. She’ll accept work built upon our exchange.

  6. Client F is insecure about his job position, so every visual decision needs to show value in a quantifiable way. (I nicknamed him Google.)

  7. Client G, an athlete, hates final solutions. I trick him into decisions by describing what could change after he’s approved it.

“And that, motherfuckers, is the kind of intelligence you will never ever learn in your bullshit little college design program.”

The foregoing posting appeared on Joe Clark’s personal Weblog on 2013.11.23 13:09. This presentation was designed for printing and omits components that make sense only onscreen. (If you are seeing this on a screen, then the page stylesheet was not loaded or not loaded properly.) The permanent link is:
https://blog.fawny.org/2013/11/23/clientsuit/

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