YOUR NEUTRAL APOSTROPHES SICKEN ME

If wiggers are white niggers, e.g., white people (usually teenaged boys) who thoughtlessly reuse stereotypically “black” styles, then isn’t it time to expand the franchise a little? It ain’t just white boys who be frontin<apostrophe>.

I swear I have witnessed all of the following:

indiggers
Indic guys (always guys) with ’do-rags, cocked ballcaps, super-expensive overlarge sweatpants with extra-thick raglan-sleeved licensed shirts, and bling. Never seen alone and always drive a riced-out car like a heavily-modded Civic, a two-generations-old Cherokee blasting bhangra at 110 dB, or – going all the way – a Hummer.
chiggers
Chinese (sic) version. Interestingly, half of them seem to be FOB, half CBC. Like white tuners, shows absolute allegiance to small Japanese cars (many of them built in Canada, the U.S., or, unbeknownst to them, England) that are a few too many years old to be fashionable, for which is overcompensated by lowered suspensions, imported engine components, wheels-within-wheels, and, above all, new white or blue signal lights.
kiggers, filiggers
Like chiggers, but Korean or Filipino. I repeat: I have seen these people, and they aren’t wiggers, indiggers, chiggers, or any other kind of -igger.
italiggers
A difficult case, as italiggers can be tricky to distinguish from Ginos (Canadian) or Guidos (American). Seems to require more jewelry than usual.
giggers (pronounced “jiggers”)
Perhaps rarest of all – the ginger wigger. Yes, this subspecies of wigger has red hair (and often lashes and brows), hence is about as far removed from being black as an ice blond or an albino. One I know of has full-sleeve tattoos and needs to eat more (and looks away from me in discomfort whenever I so much as glance at him); another had full-on knit cap, facial hair, and Clorets-like rectangular “diamond” ear “stud.” He thought I was making fun of him as I narrated his wardrobe sotte voce to my esteemed colleague. Little did he know.

See also: Chavs.

The foregoing posting appeared on Joe Clark’s personal Weblog on 2005.10.31 14:37. This presentation was designed for printing and omits components that make sense only onscreen. (If you are seeing this on a screen, then the page stylesheet was not loaded or not loaded properly.) The permanent link is:
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