I banged out this whole list entitled “Here’s what Windows users think they know about typography”:

  • Typography does not exist. How can it exist? I’ve never heard of it.

  • Even if typography might exist, it can’t be important. Now that I think of it, I know typography isn’t important. I knew that all along.

  • Even if it might be important, I already know everything anyone needs to know about it.

  • If somebody else shows up claiming to be an expert on typography, well, I am just as much of an expert. I use Microsoft Word and I can make jokes about Comic Sans.

  • I have a right to be angry at anyone who questions my skills in typography or how much I know about it. (How dare you.)

  • Apart from Comic Sans, which I can make jokes about, no font can ever be better than any other font.

  • No layout can ever be better than any other layout.

  • Typography is just “aesthetics.”

  • Microsoft Word documents do not have “typography” and don’t need it.

Waaay too long. As I wrote before: “I do not know how to explain to Windoids, NPCs, basic bitches, and other nonentities who have so little going for them that I can sum them up in catchphrases that beauty has value.”

So I boiled everything down to this:

Typography doesn’t exist,
it isn’t important,
and I’m really good at it anyway

Use that as a cudgel. I do.

The foregoing posting appeared on Joe Clark’s personal Weblog on 2020.01.25 19:19. This presentation was designed for printing and omits components that make sense only onscreen. (If you are seeing this on a screen, then the page stylesheet was not loaded or not loaded properly.) The permanent link is:

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None. I quit.

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